Solutions?

I read an article this morning that was written in response to the recent shooting. It advised that the way to stop mass shootings is to “Notice those around you who seem isolated, and engage them.”

This is sound advice to pay attention to people and interact with them. The absence of human connection does not only result in shootings, but in suicides, depression, mental illnesses, crappy outlooks on life, etc. All sorts of consequences result from the lack of human caring and each case is unique as each individual is distinct in having different experiences.

Talking to someone once or liking their Facebook post might make them feel good for a moment. Saying “hi” and smiling at someone might totally make their day! Little texts of positivity or love are meaningful. Give compliments. However, there is also the level of need where that isn’t sufficient and someone needs you more than once, needs more than your words, they need your time, they need you to listen, they need someone to laugh with and cry with. They need the genuine care that they might not know they need or they can’t, don’t, or won’t ask for it.

We also live in a world where we are told we can’t rely on other people to care for us. They have their own lives, selves, families to take care of. The feelings of love need to come from inside and we have to learn to love ourselves. By a show of hands, how many of you love yourselves? I would be curious to know. We eat right, exercise, keep our brain active and healthy, interact with others, sustain a positive or spiritual practice. The lists of how to love ourselves and be a happy, healthy individual do exist. It comes down to choices we have to make.

Have you ever thought of all the people who don’t look isolated? People put themselves out in the world to try and overcome their feelings of depression or inadequacy. They try to be what they think they should be or even who they want to be! There are people who try to love themselves and just can’t no matter how hard they try because their brains battle with them daily on how lousy they are. People do try, but it is exhausting and sometimes seems a useless effort to try and choose to be happy or choose love.

We live in a complicated world and our minds and emotions are complex. Love yourself if you can. Yes, do engage with those who feel isolated. Pay attention to your family members. Connect with people outside of your family.

Is this the solution to the chaos that can exist in an individual?  “All you need is love.” Right? I can give you religious answers to turn to. Is this part of our existence to suffer to learn and grow from? We might think we have answers. We might have and be answers for some people.

But,
to the person that feels alone
to the one with commotion inside your head and heart
to the one who can’t seem to feel love
to the one who can’t love yourself
to the one who feels worthless. . .

I love you. I get it. I am there. How I wish I could sit and cry with you. Or punch out with you all you feel inside. Cause I know. People do love us and they are trying to help. I know, we try our best and sometimes it is absolutely tiring! Don’t give up. Do your best! Your efforts are enough. Today I don’t feel like I am one to give you hope or advice. Today, my friend, just breathe. You are not alone. You are needed. You are loved.

Breathe